The ultimate 'I want' list (revised)

Ok due to a technical hitch, half the blog went hiking off and never came back, so here it is again, this time with the missing bits :)

The ultimate 'I want' list



I want a functioning brain

And a working body

A happy family

And joyful friends

The perfect job 

And the perfect house

Swimming in money

And a holiday or two

I want someone that cleans

And someone that cooks

Someone that drives 

And a fancy car

I want a functioning brain

And a working body

But most importantly 

I WANT IT ALL!



And really, why shouldn't I? Why can't we have our cake and eat it?



I think to a certain point we can have it all, or at least everything we want. It's about finding the perfect balance and knowing what we truly want. What I want is everything, but what I truly want is simple, I want to be happy. And why shouldn't I be? I have a wonderful husband, a beautiful baby, a loving mother and great friends, surely that's enough? But for me it's never enough, as a bond song once said 'The World Is Not Enough', maybe Mr Bond has OCD too!! My problem is that as much as I have the wonderful family, it's not perfect, because I am not perfect. Because I will never be perfect, no matter how hard I try. Because once I reach my target, I'll just move my target 😏 my mum told me the other day that I 'set the bar too high' for myself, but why shouldn't I? Why shouldn't I stretch myself to reach that ultimate perfection. You don't tell a pole vaulter that he's set the bar to high, you tell him to jump higher! In fact the Olympic slogan is "Citius, Altius, Fortius" meaning: faster, higher, stronger. And we don't tell athletes they are running to fast or jumping to high, do we? 'Oiiiii Bolt, slow it down, you're pushing yourself to far and to fast' 'Oiiii Wiggins, stop peddling so fast, your setting yourself up to fail'. The only way you can achieve more is to push yourself and challenge yourself. To demand more from yourself, for all intents and purposes, I am an Olympic OCDer! I will set that bar higher, and you never know, one day I might clear it!



So we can have everything that we truly inherently want, but what about the stuff we want, the missed opportunities, the other choices we didn't choose? What do we do with them? 

I hate making a decision because once you choose one thing, you shut the door to the other!!! But what if I want both, both choices at the same time? What would happen if I chose both? Would the world implode? Would the known universe come crashing down around us? In a sense yes. My universe would fracture by the sheer force of choosing and maintaining two things at once. One of your choices will over power the other eventually and leave you in a mess without either of your choices, and that would be sad 😪. Are you following me on this one? Or have you given up hope that I'll ever make sense and made the choice to stop reading?



Ok so here is a simple example: someone offers me either chocolate or vanilla ice cream, but I only have one bowl. Now I can choose the velvety creaminess of the vanilla, or the rich sweetness of the chocolate. But being the fat pig that I am, I order both. To begin with this works fine, a mouthful of yummy vanilla followed by a mouthful of yummy chocolate mmmmm, but as I carry on, the ice creams begin to melt and merge and I can't keep my ice creams in order. All I end up with is a weak  chocolate mess. I no longer have my velvety vanilla as the chocolate has over powered it, but by doing so the richness of the chocolate has been diluted. Now nothing tastes as good!!! 



So I guess the moral is, yes you can have it all, but you'll just end up with a sticky messy milkshake, and no one wants that, do they?